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#3 on Maslow's Heirarchy of Needs is Love and Belonging. The need to feel loved - to have a family and be in relationships: both professional and personal. Ultimately its the desire to feel wanted. Most of our youth is spent trying to find our place in this world, our families fill that void of love and belonging without us even realizing it. As we get older, we date to find a companion to share our lives with and fulfill that #3 need. In between relationships, we all have those people of the opposite sex, that are "fillers" An ex-boyfriend, past fling, someone you met while traveling, a guy friend; someone that may be a 'runner-up' or even third place in a relationship race, knowing they aren't what you want in a partner, but they will do for the time being. Their purpose: to keep you busy, until something better comes along. Mostly through text messaging, they are the ones that we turn to when lonely. So when do these fillers start to be a crutch, preventing us from using the opportunity to get stronger? Instead of relying on someone else to fill that need, what is wrong with trying to use the insecurity as a springboard to become a better person?

In my own experiences, nothing can ever come good from being entirely dependent on someone else to feel better. The art of becoming needy, is not something I want to capture. It takes a lot of strength and faith, but its worth it, to know you were able to control your own happiness - rather than needing someone else to do it for you. How to do it? Keep busy!! Get involved in church, take up a hobby, read, work out, take yoga, meet up with friends, travel - there are so many options! ..and who knows, you may even learn something about yourself in the process!

Top 5 Songs:

1. Best Thing I Never Had - Beyonce
2. She Ain't You - Chris Brown
3. Love Lost - Mac Miller
4. F**ckin Perfect - P!nk
5. What the Hell - Avril Lavigne

LBJ

If you consider yourself an athlete, than you love to compete. Some compete for the pure enjoyment - others compete to win. When you are at the professional level: salaries, endorsement deals, and recognition are dependent upon performance, in addition to, wins and loses. As fans, we love to watch our team win - which is why we pay high ticket prices or even splurge on season tickets. However, some sports enthusiasts feel that paying to watch someone play gives them an automatic opinion.

Take for instance LeBron James of the Miami Heat. Yes, I admit, I was one of the 9 million viewers who tuned in to see what team LeBron would choose - in the back of my mind knowing that he would be going to either the Heat or Bulls; but hoping he would choose to stay in his hometown. Was I disappointed when he chose Miami? Of course! How fair was it that LeBron and D-Wade would be on the same team? The next A-Rod and Jeter? Not to mention, how would this decision affect the city of Cleveland? The city whose greatest love had just broken up with them, and chosing to move on to greener pastures.

Then I thought about the situation, this wasn't a long term relationship - LeBron wasn't committed to Cleveland, they didn't put a "ring on it" or try to keep him. It was expected for him to stay, and they never thought he would leave them, even if he was unhappy. Life is short, and often we only get one shot - so who could blame a natural athlete, a guy that competes and wins for a living, to switch to a team where he gets to play with his best friend, and is currently competing for an NBA title. I certainly can't. I wish LeBron the best, and am definitely cheering for the Heat. Team Heat baby!

Top 5 Songs:

1. Rolling in the Deep - Adele
2. Man Down - Rihanna
3. A Kiss - Eminem and Royce Da 5'9
4. Motivation (remix) - Kelly Rowland/Jeremih/Lil Wayne
5. She Don't Want A Man - Curren$y

Settle? no way!

Why has society allowed a number to be an accepted standard for people to live by? Granted, I understand that you have to be 16 to drive, 18 to buy cigarettes or get into clubs, and 21 to drink and gamble; but graduate college by 22, own a house by 24, be married at 25 and have your first kid by 30 - and anyone over 30 and single, is considered over the hill and destined to be alone and miserable? Says who?!

I laugh to myself because I've never been one to follow anyone. I live my life according to my own rules, and why wouldn't I? I could care less what anyone says, I am going to make choices that I want and feel are best for me. I am not living for anyone else, I am living for me. Trust me, if I wanted to be in a serious relationship, I'd be in one right now (I know, cocky). If I wanted to be married, I would be married; but I don't ...not right now anyways. Sure, I want to eventually be married, with a successful job, 2.5 kids, living in a quaint house with a nicely manicured green lawn, playing bunko every Thursday - but not now. It's just not the right time, and I am not willing to settle to have it. Honestly, it is my time to be selfish. I am young and want to travel, experience things because I don't have 'baggage' to hold me down. I am slowly checking things off my pre-marriage bucket list - and close to being finished, but there are still a few things remaining. When I have a family, they will be my first priority, and I don't want to have regrets, wishing I would have done this or that, before planting my roots.

Plus, I have been there to comfort MANY of my friends who have already divorced, left raising their kids, alone, because they rushed into marriage. Not to say that I am against getting married early, my parents married when they were 20 years old and are still going strong, 36 years later. They are the exception. My parents are my role model, and the sanctity of marriage means something; so with the divorce rates over 60% - I will be damn sure I marry the right person. The guy I wanna spend FORever on.

To be honest, I really haven't found anyone that knocks my socks off; and when I do I am sure my wants and desires will change. Who knows? Through all of my adventures, I may find a guy, just as wild to run with :)

Top 5 Songs:
1. Mean - Taylor Swift
2. I Need A Doctor - Eminem
3. Throwed Off - Treal Lee
4. Twisted - Keith Sweat
5. I Get Lonely - Drake

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know your worth

It's funny when you think of Arizona, because the first thing that comes to mind is the heat. I've lived in Arizona my whole life, and I will be the first one to admit that the heat in the summer is ridiculous. It is truly like an oven and you only go outside when its absolutely necessary; but as I see the devastation in Alabama and Louisiana from hurricanes and tornadoes; or the ice storms in the north east parts of the nation, I feel guilty complaining about the heat. We don't have earthquakes, tornadoes, mud slides, hurricanes, tsunamis - we just have high temperatures. To be honest, if you have a pool, its really not that bad because AZ pool parties are pretty sweet.

But with any warm weather, less clothes becomes apparent. Keeping cool often turns into an excuse for girls to wear almost nothing, and society being okay with it. Like shorts two inches shorter are really going to keep you that much cooler. I know my male friends are probably saying that I'm crazy and to shut it, but its hard to see girls expose themselves to that degree; because ultimately it affects the reputation of ALL girls.

So does wearing barely any clothes mean "easy" or confidence? That is something that can be debated. It's funny because I consider myself a fashionable person, but I don't let my clothes wear me. I've always had the philosophy that if you are going to show leg, then cover the top portion and accessorize; and if you are going to wear a low cut shirt, then cover your legs and wear heels to balance everything out. Showing both is too much, and leaves little to the imagination. I've never respected girls who walk around with 'assets' hanging out, exposing them for the world to see. Why? Do you need attention that bad? Because I promise you - you won't receive the kind of attention you deserve, you're only gonna get the douchebags - that don't necessarily have the best intentions. Guys want someone they can take home to thier Mom, not someone that could be found on the streets of Van Buren.

Walk in to room with your head held high, a smile across your face, and your shoulders held back. You could be wearing work out clothes and have your hair tied in a pony tail, but you will radiate confidence and have the attention of every guy in the room.

Top 5 songs:
1. All of the Lights - Remix
2. Get Me Everything (tonight) - NE-Yo
3. Oh My - DJ Drama/Wiz Khalifa
4. The Kid Frankie - Wiz Khalifa
5. ET Remix - Katy Perry/Kanye West